Thursday, February 21, 2008

Small talk

One thing I've never quite figured out is how one should respond to a leading question or conversation starter such as "How's it going?" or "waaasssupp?" and the like..

We all face variations of this small talk almost everyday and everywhere..and even indulge in it from time to time (sigh). One should be quick to realize that nobody really wants to hear "I have a cold and feel like something even the cat wouldn't bring home" (you get the picture). This phenomenon almost borders on the ridiculous when the questions come flying at you from a person walking towards you in the corridor. If you time it right, you just might have enough time to say "Great!" before the other person vanishes into thin air. And that brings me back to the crux of the matter..what is the right response? Is there one? :P Oh well..

But then again, society seems to demand small talk. I've had countless conversations over the past few weeks with random people about the vaguest things possible. Like when I got onto the crowded lift at the ground floor in an attempt to not take the stairs to get to my lab (which is on the 6th floor of the building, by the way) , only to find that the whole lot of them got off on the FIRST floor. The only thing left to do was laugh and smile at the only other person left in the lift , who was muttering under her breath about how lazy and inconsiderate people are these days ;) It's those brief conversations and experiences that kind of give me a high at times. You feel a remote connection with the other person for that nano-second and it prompts you to say hello to them the next time you see them in the corridor!

I've always believed that each and every one of us is a social being..no matter how anti-social we claim to be :) I guess that's what compels us to greet other people in the corridor with "How're you doing?"! It's either that..or it's the memory of someone not responding to a greeting, looking right through you and making you feel part of the wood-work that urges you not to make anyone else feel that way. I am forever the optimist :)

This is not to say that I'm at a total loss for words every time that I have a question like that thrown at me. The usual response is "Nothing much" and then the conversation just seems to get underway on its own. I guess the same funda is true in the case of saying 'goodbye'. Most of the time, 'See you soon" or "I'll see you around" comes as an automatic way to indicate the end of a conversation. What if you really don't intend to hang around with that person again? :P But I have to admit, there are times when it just seems impolite to leave a conversation or room with a terse "bye". I guess a decent substitute would be..

Monday/Tuesday - "Have a good week!"
Wednesday - "What plans for the weekend?"
Thursday/Friday - "Have a good weekend!"

And now that my secret is out..please don't mind when I use these lines on one of you ;) For those of you who really wanted to know..I've been fine..great actually!(even though some of you may claim that my recent poems may show otherwise :P) I'm back to my lazy self, sleeping in when I should be getting ready to run and catch the bus to work, taking trips to my own world of make-believe where I don't notice when people say hi to me, making lots of enthusiastic plans to go out and ending up just staying indoors and eating a lot of Marie biscuits and curd:) Yup..I'd say life is pretty much back to normal :D

9 comments:

Mithun Jacob said...

Lol..that's one of the reasons I love India (most parts of it!). When you walk into the room or an elevator, there's no compulsive need to say "Hi, how're you doing?" or bid farewell to everyone leaving the place with "Have a good one now!".

The US on the other hand, manOman..it reaches a point where's it just dumb. Especially the service personnel..lol, it's quite hilarious when a Taco Bell employee plonks down a burrito with a very fast, "Thankyouforcomingtotacobell.Haveaniceday.nextplease!!!" and with a deadpan expression!!

Lol..what's even better is the mindblowing first coupla sentences between a customer & a service employee. They quickly spit out the words montonously so as to get it out of the way so they can get down to business!

I love India :) cuz I can walk in anywhere, get the job done and walk out without engaging in meaningless formalities like small talk.

Mithun Jacob said...

Excellent post btw..your writing style's totally changed! (which doesn't imply there was anything wrong with your previous style :P )

R!@ said...

@ mgj - thanks for dropping by :)

gsk said...

I thought this space was for other people to comment, and not for them to write their own blog [:|]...

gsk said...

This is a good one btw!

Camphor said...

See, with me, (And most freinds), we want to hear that you feel like something that the cat dragged in.

:P Maybe it makes us feel good.

OK, so we aren't sadists, and it doesn't make us feel good, but the "I'm great and you?" is so automatic that one feels like turning tail and running. And the last para is what we're hoping to hear.

All the how're you in the corridors are no more than "Hello. I see you!"...

@gsk - a blog and its comments section is whatever the blog-owner wants it to be :P including a soap box, or chatbox (or non-existant).

R!@ said...

@gsk- mgj must have had one of those moments :P I sure as hell am not complaining ;)I still can't get over how you were actually scratching your head over who mgj was :D (even if it was momentarily) hehe..as always..it's nice to have you dropping by! when do we get something new from you?
@s- lol..it's interesting to hear what everyone's been saying in response to this post!

haz said...

u started bloggin!!!!

sam said...

hehe.. good one da..the blog speaks of hours spent on just yapping around with people and roaming around in coll.. hehe.. keep on blogging.. it was really good